Because happiness is a commitment

life commit -m “be happy :)” (ask your programmer friend)

Photo by Hybrid on Unsplash

Running through the park without a care in the world. Not a care in the world is exactly how I ended up dropping the house keys and my pocket money. I didn’t realize what had happened so I simply when home. It’s funny how you can’t get into a locked house without keys. As panic set in, I sprinted back to the park. In my life, I have proved to be as fortunate as I am forgetful. So I was able to find the house keys and my pocket money. Moments like that provided me with the most stress when I was younger. They came often but disappeared often. So in general, I was a happy wide-eyed kid, fascinated by almost everything I came across.

Moments like that make it difficult to recognize who I have become. It’s hard to recognize myself when I am feeling down for long periods. When I want to like giving up. When I want to like running away. When I lose joy doing things I’ve always loved. That happy wide-eyed kid isn’t there anymore. My journey into “adulting” has not been smooth. In the process, I’ve allowed myself to let go of the person I was.

What has changed?

Photo by Tulen Travel on Unsplash

The more I’ve grown, the more negative experiences I’ve been exposed to. Those experiences feed into my doubts, my serious case of imposter’s syndrome and my urges to give up when things are difficult. Especially when things are difficult for long periods. What I failed to realize sometimes is that focus is key. When you are focused on problems and challenges, they’re never in short supply. 3 things are guaranteed in life, death, taxes, and challenges. I sometimes take for granted that my happy disposition is due to my nature, it’s innate. So I’ve never had to practice how to stay happy. As I have battled with this life lesson, I’ve been slowly losing who I’ve been for the majority of my life. It’s hard not to change while life is happening. But being aware of the challenge helps me put in more effort in staying happy.

My approach to happiness has also been very naive. I have this desire for everything to go perfectly, to be ideal. Life seldom is. Life is like the sea. They are always waves. Some small, some huge. Trying to ensure smooth sailing at all times is impossible. The best thing you can do is temper your mind. Leave room for things to go wrong. And be okay when things go wrong. Because you have to be okay eventually. There’s still plenty of sea to navigate. Life doesn’t stop. Like the sea, it’s never still. Like a sailor can’t pause the waves to catch his breath, we can’t stop life from going on. But I’ve found that preparation and commitment help. Mental preparation and commitment to seeing things through. They help me to feel less helpless when things do go wrong. It helps me keep steering my life when things unravel in the most horrible ways.

When was the last time you were happy for a decent duration?

Trying to find an answer to this question is what helped me think back to my childhood. To simpler, happier times. But I have too much life left to live to let that be the last time I was happy for a long period So here’s to committing to being happy. To being ready to fight extremely hard for something that’s really important to me. Something I can’t live without. My happiness.

Sugar, spice and everything nice?

For me to be happy, I need to find constant time to create for the sake of creating (it’s like an itch I can’t control). I need to sleep for 7–8 hours a night. I need to learn something new. I need to run more than twice a week. I need to have one chocolate every week (different ones for different moods). I need to spend time doing things for others (I love feeling useful to people… it’s a gift and a curse). I need to watch at least one sunset every week and take lots of photos! Finding time to watch the clouds would also be nice. That’s my happiness formulae.

Are you committed to being happy? What do you do to stay happy?

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Limichilwe Simwanza

Limichilwe Simwanza

Developer. Dabbler in design, writing, and all things creative.